Jesus

On Tuesday, I planned my whole day around my son meeting his sister.  On Thursday, I watched my son hold his little sister with such awe and love that it was tangible.  The only thing is, I did not give him this little sister, his dad did.

Nothing solidifies my failure more than watching my son get everything I ever wanted to give him through someone else.  You know, a home with brother and sister and mom and dad all under the same roof.   My failure as woman, as a mom, as a human being, all because I do not have a family for my son.  A "family" at our home, you know a mother and a dad every time he is here, and a sister and a brother. No one wants a not so skinny, single mom with baggage.  I have no prospects, no ability to provide any of that "family" for my son.

But then, last night I watched my sister have dinner with all of her family.  The pretense was to celebrate her and Cody's birthday.  But the real reason that everyone was there to tell Brillyn "see you later".  Next week, Ashley and Cody will place the life of their son in the hands of some very capable hands.  But, as they fake a smile, force a laugh, put on a strong face for everyone else, I know the real struggle is something that most people will never imagine.  Anyone who is a
mother, father,  aunt/uncle, friend of kids, who has half a heart can feel their anxiety, but it isn't even half of what they are going through.

As I am driving home that night, I am listening to a song.  I am not paying attention but I hear one line.  I hear nothing before and I hear nothing after.  But that one line says it all.

It goes:  "There is power in the name of Jesus".

There you have it folks.  There is power in the name of Jesus.  We all have our own struggles, concerns, fears, failures, but there is an amazing power when we call on Jesus.  I could never imagine putting the life of my child into someone else hand and have no guarantee of the outcome.  She will watch those doctors take him back to the operating room, but they will have no guarantee of the end result.  But, there is one guarantee, no matter the outcome.  Jesus is real.  He can give us hope no matter the situation.  His Father watched Him leave His protection, come to earth, only to be crucified on a cross.  He knew the outcome.  He knows her struggle.  He put his life in their hands.  But that sacrifice was not in vein.  It is so that we can spend eternity with Him.  Brillyn, no matter the outcome will be with either loving parents and family, or with an even greater Heavenly Father when this is all said and done.  The only question is will you be there as well?  Have you called on the name of Jesus?

We can do it now.  I would ask for a family, a husband, a baby, and a happy and healthy Kole.  Or, even though I know that His will is perfect, I will beg that it is to leave Brillyn with us for as long as possible.  He gives everyone around him a light and an joy that you don't get to experience very often.  He is so strong and courageous.  And, he is sooooo stubborn that there is no way this child will not surprise everyone, including the doctors.  This boy has fought for something that we all take for granted every day.  He has fought for his life since day one.  He will continue to fight until we are all very old and decrepit.  But, he can only do that through the Power of Jesus.  So please Lord, give him your strength so he can show us your Hope.

You can do it now.  Just say JESUS, I want to know you.   There you have, it is that simple.