Holy Spirit

I am doing what I do best today.  I am listening to music!  I love my T.V. for this reason.  I can turn on Pandora from there and Kole and I can rock out, listen, sing dance, what have you.  Probably not the prettiest site or sound but it is still fun.

Well there is this song that I have heard many times and lately it has got me thinking.  The song is sung by Kari Job and its called Holy Spirit.  Here is a video of this song.

Holy Spirit

So the line that has me thinking is "Holy Spirit you are welcomed here."   Part of the reason I have been thinking about is because someone used the line at church once.  The other reason is because I like to sing along with this song.  And that line is basically inviting the Holy Spirit to come to where I am.  So I am welcoming Him in my car, my home, my work.  Where ever I am when I am singing it He is welcome.

One of the times I was singing it I actually payed attention to what I was singing.  I was actually praying what I was I singing, not just blindly repeating the words.  And a light bulb went off.

For so long I have placed God in this box.  When I read the Bible I ask for guidance.  At church I pray that He changes hearts, mostly my hardened and jaded and bitter heart. At work sometimes I will ask that he gives me the strength or energy to get through it.  But I am to unimportant for Him to be present in other times.  My concerns and my everyday life is to insignificant for Him to want to be present in moments that I see as little or no meaning.

But when I put God in a box, I am missing so much of who He is and so many opportunities to praise Him.  He is my Father, my Love, my best friend, my protector, my navigator.  My box has Him pictured as a figure sitting on a throne.  Which, he is.  But He sent the Holy Spirit to us for to have a personal relationship with so that He can be sitting on the throne and we can have that ever present, personal, passionate relationship with him in the big instances of life and the seemingly meaningless  moments.

Now, there is another part of this box that I need to put to rest.  It is the reason that I have developed these boxes.  Above I said that I am to unimportant for Him to be present.  That my everyday life is insignificant for Him to want to be present.  These thought processes are my self-protecting mechanisms.  Learned a long time ago as a child and reinforced as an adult.  If I know that I am insignificant, then it will not hurt as much when someone I care about feels that way too.  If people choose things or other people over me, it does not hurt because they should.  If people who used to like me no longer like me, that is how it should be because I am not enough of something (I have a list of "not enoughs") to have someone want to be around me or be my friend or a boyfriend.   If Kole would rather be at his Dad's I totally get that because I am boring and tired mom who makes him play by himself all the time.

BUT.  He chose me.  He adopted me.  He placed this desire on my heart to know Him, not because I am insignificant and meaningless.  But, because I am of great value to Him.  I am His beloved.  I was the lost sheep that He left the others to come and find.  I am the adulterous woman that He did not condemn.  I am the tax collector he chose to eat with.  I am the sinner that He chose to make clean.  I am the empty vessel He came and filled.    I am important enough for the little times and the big times.  I not obsolete and at least to One Person I matter.  At least to One Person, I am enough to be with.